Rheumatoid Arthritis

As you may have seen my profile, I have had this RA for the past 10 years. I also have Fibro kind of bad. Lately, I have been a little depressed and even mad at myself. I have been divorced for for a very long time and only in one other pathetic relationship. I'm a single mother of three wonderful kids, two whom still live with me because my oldest son has started his own family. I wonder sometimes if I will ever meet someone who could love me with my issues with RA. I am becoming deformed in many joints, and being 39, feel hopeless at times and angry that I don't turn to God more often than I do. I don't even know if I should be wondering about relationships ever again, I have so many other problems with this RA that I have given up and tell myself there's more to life than a relationship. I feel ugly and unworthy of love. I admit I don't take too much care of myself on my bad days because I don't have the strength at times. Maybe that is why God doesn't feel it's time to send me someone, i have to work on myself first. I just get discouraged sometimes. I don't feel there's a guy out there willing to deal with all this. Now a days, alot of guys are into the looks of a woman instead of what's on the inside.

Oh darlin'! I am the last one to advise on matters of the heart, but I couldn't bear to see you so sad with no response. I don't know what to tell you other than God loves you and wants you well and happy. He and I have had some bouts as well, but now I like to think that rather than having it in for me, he cries when I do and hurts when I do. Nobody but nobody is unworthy of love. I wish I had more for ya sweetie, but that's all I got. I hear you and I'm sorry your sad.

Cheer up! When the time is right that special person will come along. Until then, work on you, your interests, what makes you happy and be the person that you have always dreamed of being. Get out there and accomplish some life goals you have. I know what you mean abut feeling ugly. My hands and ankles have been so swollen that I have pictures where you can see the knots in the sides of my wrists and my ankles look huge! You can get through this, WE will get through this, but don't give up on life or love! Love you and that special someone will come one day : )

Do not give up. There is life and relationships after RA. I am 43 and have had RA for 10 years now. I was diagnosed shortly after my divorce after 11 years of marriage and four children so I am a single-parent also-now all grown up and moved out on their own now.

At this time I am trying to deal with relationships with two seperate men. One a long time boyfriend (six years now)who has no intention of ever moving forward in our relationship and would love to keep things exactly as they are (we had lived together for two years) and an ex-boyfriend who has just reappeared after breaking up with me years ago. He is wanting to marry me. This is a situation that I never thought I would be dealing with at my age. I have deformities of my feet and starting on my hands, I am on ten seperate medications for the RA treatment (and associated side-effects) daily. I am 50 pounds overweight and have spent the last fifteen years fighting depression. I have just started treatment six weeks ago with Orencia and so far it has not really helped but in spite of it all, my life is good and I have learned to make the best of it.

I never would have believed it even five years ago but; even though the RA can and will take over if it so chooses, as long as I stay in control of what I can do about it I could not be happier with my life and am determined to live it to its' fullest.

Hi Maria,

I feel your pain. I feel really unattrative on my days as well, and have developed some really negative body image issues due to my Arthritis. I'm actually really worried myself if any man will accept me with my arthritis and all its unpredictabel episodes and support I would need...

but I agree with Newlywed22, go out and do things for you, because once you are in a relationship there wont be too much you time ! Not sure if I helped, but I totally get where you're coming from ... and we have God, so there is hope