Migraine

Hey guys,
as you know, I had the all important diary evaluation appointment and talk with the cardiologist yesterday.

well it turns out that 14.3 migraines average over three months ( their required max was 14) was borderline. They left it to the discretion of my cardiologist.

He decided*without consulting me first of course* that I was unfit for further study, especially if I were to have surgery, because if I were to have a repeat of that weird neurological episode that happened in late january , after the surgery, it might be hard for the study to prove that it was a repeat illness and not something caused by the pfo implant....

Anyhow, they were extremely condescending... appearing to totally not get why I was sobbing wholeheartedly in the office. Then the cardiologist saying " how to put this..... do you need help with your emotional problems?" I told him " cut the condescending garbage will you? I think its absolutely normal to be crying after you've been dangling this carrot of hope for three months, and now you've just withdrawn it"

So anyhow, they referred me to a specialist in heart rythms *since mine is off* and sent me on my way.

I've been going around in a stupor since yesterday, barely eating, crying on and off and just not caring about anything except the fact that my heart won't be fixed for at least another year. I'm just finding it very difficult to see the good in this situation...
I could use you guys...
bim

Oh Bim dear, so sorry about the big disappointment! I know you've had a lot of hope riding on this! I don't know what to say except send you lots of hugs and I know you can get through this, one day at a time! Lean on us!

- megs

Oh Bim, I am so sorry to hear this. I know this must be a big disappointment for you.

I'm sending lots of hugs and love your way.

Sorry to hear that, Bim.

Bim I'm so sorry.

Cindy

What a blow. Wish you could have landed it on one of them. Sounds like they deserved it.

Bim,

I'm so sorry!

Thinking of you,
jenny

I'm sorry things didn't go as you'd so hoped they would, Bim. It's not easy getting hopes dashed like that.

Yes, ideally the cardiologist should've discussed this with you before he made his ultimate decision. But would that have really changed his mind? It might not have. He does have a point in that any further neurological events that might crop up would complicate the findings of the study. Studies cost a lot of money to run, particularly when there is surgery involved. They're going to want to choose candidates who they think will provide the most clear-cut results, and the ability to help them sort out cause and effect. Unfortunately, that kind of thing often leaves out those of us that are more unpredictably medically wonky. Plus, there's no guarantee your PFO is at fault. There's always the chance that you'd find either a limited or no change with the surgery, too. You have to keep all the possibilities in mind, and not count your chickens before they hatch. There are never any guarantees when you enter a study process. You can't bank on things too much.

Is is disappointing? Sure. Is it heartbreaking? It can be. End fo the world? No. You have to pick yourself up from this and go on.

The good news is that they are sending you to someone to check out the arrythmia issue. And they are willing to help you get through this emotionally. You yourself said that you were sobbing wholeheartedly. Yes, it's normal to be disappointed, and normal to cry in such a situation, but when you sob wholeheartedly, looking hysterical, then it's obvious you're having trouble dealing with the emotional letdown. Perhaps it was much less condescending than compassion.

I'm sorry it was such a rough time for you. But you can regroup. Hang in there. Deep breaths, positive thinking, and . You're going to get through this.