I'm 41 and my boyfriend is 35. He suffers from a major depressive disorder and is on several anti-depressants and mood stabilizers. As a result of both the depression and the medications, he has had NO sex drive and severe ED for a year and a half.
Our relationship is suffering. We fight constantly now, mostly because neither one can understand where the other one's head is at.
I feel that sex IS an important part of a relationship...he does not. He's is completely fine with that part of his life being over...I am not. I miss the closeness. I don't feel special to him anymore. My self esteem has suffered...I feel like a big part of what makes me female is gone now. I'm in mourning over the loss of something special and he can't understand that.
I take issue with his porn habit. I can't understand WHY he's want to bother looking if he isn't getting any reaction from it. And there is no WAY I compete with those images at my age and after having 2 kids!
Then there is "touching". He won't touch me in any sexual way even if it's just for my benefit. He really never did, but I wish he could see that it would be a way for us to be close. Hell, I have done PLENTY of things for his benefit that I didn't particularly want to do!
BUT, that said...in order to make me happy, he asked for a prescription for Cialis (the 36 hour dose). The first pill did absolutely nothing. He took a second a day and a half later....still nothing. In my mind...if that didn't work...nothing will.
I'm just so lost. I love him with all my heart and would never want to live without him in my life. But I feel like I'm just too young to give up sex completely. I have NO interest in other men and wouldn't cheat if I did. I guess I'm searching for a way to accept my fate and take sex off my priority list.
*~*Toni*~*