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I don't know how to start this column other than to say this is my first time on a DB and I have no idea what I am going through. It hit me like a ton of bricks within the last couple months. I never imagined this could be depression because I had battled the loss of a parent, a nasty divorce, and struggling to survive being a single parent while working full time and going to college 3/4 of the time all fine. I never missed a beat. Recently I got re-married and he left on assignment for a few months which we are tailing the end of. The pressures of life have seemed to make me want to crawl in bed and not do anything I mean it takes an act of congress to do the grocery shopping and work, not to mention I barely made it through the last semester of school. When I talk to him I am frustrated with him and he makes me mad. He has not been the most perfect man but he is the greatest I have ever had in my life and certainly does not deserve my attitude. He takes care of us, and loves us, and trys to do things to make me happy, but I feel a hatred deep in my heart about so many things towards him, towards work, and towards all that I struggle to do each day. Over the last 4 weeks my back and body have started to hurt. I feel no gumption to have conversations on the phone with friends or family and sometimes space out when I am talking to them. Sometimes after I eat I feel sick and in fact whether I eat or not around 5 or 6pm every night I feel like a dump truck ran over me. I use to love getting a cup of coffee and sitting on the back porch in the evenings watching the animals and feeling the breeze and it has not seemed appealing to me lately at all. I really could use someone taking a moment to give me their opinion on what I just wrote. Is this depression or do I have some kind of central nervous system disease creeping in to take over my mind and my body. I appreciate your thoughts.
It sounds like you're experiencing depression. You should seek help from a mental health professional to get it under control before it gets any deeper.
