Chronic Pain

hi.
Please respond to this . I am curious if speaking to others will help.

Before I go into my story of pain let me say this.......Chronis pain really makes life hard.
It has depressed me, physically abused me,mentally abused me and my family and made me a drug user. thanks chronic pain.
Waking up every morning is no longer something I look forward to. if it is not a hydrocodine fog it is just a crooked spine, spasms and pain. What a way to start a day!

I said it made me a drug user. let me elaborate a bit. I try desperately to take pills only at night (after work). If I need pills at work I use non-narcotics (they rarely work). Just so you know I am not a pill popper.

Now here is my story or chrnic complaining. (another side effect)
I just turned 32 years old and have realized that I probably have not been pain free in at least 6 years. Wow! that is a long time. I herniated the L4/L5 vertabrate in my lower back while lifting sheetrock onto a ceiling about 6 yearsago. the pain shot down my leg in excrusiating fashion and I had to have a discectomy. The discectomy worked but then the disc got "squished" and bone was rubbing on bone (degenerttive disc desease)
a year and a half of pain led me to operation #2. Spinal fusion. For a few months I thought it worked but I got hit with the side effect I dreaded. The disc above it started to go as a result of additional stress being put on it. Now the pain is unbearable a lot of the time. UNBEARABLE. AS I type this I am in my office and in major pain. I am debating going home. I have tried all the back supports, heat pads and braces. nothing works. I am currently making a super tight sandwich with me and my desk in a feeble attempt to lessen the stress.

It really affects every aspect of life. I am depressed because I am in constant pain, the pills are going to kill me (i know it), I worry about playing with my toddler and new born. I worry about the bitchyness I sometimes give my wife because all day long I am in extreme pain.
I am sad because I think the days of me hiking through mountains and playing sports are done. I can honestly say that chronic pain has made me miserable and at certain point clinically depressed. This is the first time I am typing about this. It doesn't help the pain but maybe my wife won't have to hear "oh...my back is killing me" tonight. I feel liek a friggin complainer! I hate this

Hi scooby,

Welcome to ChronicPainConnection! I'm sorry to hear that you're suffering with so much pain. I know how difficult it is to get through day after day of work in pain.

You mentioned that you try not to take pain medication during the work day. Does it affect your ability to function at your job? I ask because you really do need round the clock pain relief. It's very hard to get pain under control once it's gotten really bad. It's usually better to take pain medication regularly so the pain is never allowed to get "off the charts" bad.

I don't know what kind or how much pain medication you take, so I don't know whether this would be appropriate right now or not. But you might want to look into an intrathecal pain pump. They provide round the clock pain relief and only use a tiny fraction of the amount of pain medication that is needed when taken orally. You can find more information on pain pumps here: Pain Pumps We also have an excellent discussion on pain pumps here in the forum under General Discussion. The thread is entitled “Willing to share experience with intrathecal morphine pump implant.” It was started and is maintained by Bob Englebardt. It's where everyone gathers to ask questions and discuss their experiences with pain pumps. It's a really long post, but you might like to browse through and see how others feel about theirs.

Another option you might want to look into as well is a neurostimulator. The link I have you above also has info on neurostimulators. That is a drug-free option and can work well when the pain is from one particular area of your spine.

I hope you're able to find something soon that will enable you to get your pain under control so you can enjoy your time with your wife and children.

Best,
Karen

Awww dont be so hard on yourself.I have been in pain with 4 different types of headaches for about 10 years and know how sometimes one needs to vent. And I also learned that there is usually a line of people willing to knock you down and kick you when you feel like dog leavings. So try not to be so hard on yourself. It is ok to vent!!! And now you have all of us to vent to so you can give your wife and kids a break. Giggle. I know my DH appriciates his breaks! I hope you get the help you need. I often consider myself fortunate that I have the Cluster headaches, Migraines, Trigeminal Neuralgia and Chronic Persistent Daily Headaches rather than low back pain. That is an entirely different type of hell and I can appriciate what you and others like you are going thru.
Sending you wishes for low pain and gentle hugs from Denmark, Sophia