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Hi All: I was so self absorbed i forgot it was november. Well, after yesterday I feel so much better getting all off chest. Up at 4 with severe pain left hip(laying side)ugh a great day instore coldddddddd outside. Coffee a need, now. Then check on appt with new doc(in4-5 hours once they get in, hard to work in everyday world when we are up all nite , can't do everything in cyberspace. Hope all have a great day
Good Morning all, Woke with terrible pain in my lumbar and lower legs, meds are finally starting to ease it a bit. Yesterday was nice weather wise and pain wise, hardly bothered me at all yesterday. 4am a spasm behind the new woke me the first time, things are back to normal... nan-Sometimes you just gotta tell 'em how ya feel, wether it changes anything or not. I hope the new doc works out for you and you can have good working relation- ship with him and his staff. Betty-I guess the upgrade is doin ok? You've have a trip to the city comin up?? I kinda miss the options that the city provides sometimes, the restaurants especially. We don't have much here so, we don't eat out very often. Have a good day all. cm
It's going pretty well here at Crooked Creek Ranch. It took me quite awhile to fall asleep last night, but when I did, I atleast had about 4 hours of good rest. I'm feeling better than I had figured, after such an unexpected crazy busy day yesterday. My pain went down while I was resting in bed last pm, so I'm feeling fairly well this morning and pain is only around a 4, which is amazing for Maw.
Since I have so many people coming and going today, I was able to delegate Helens hair apt over to her other niece Sas. So I could stay here and wait for the grocery delivery and the gardner.
Back at 12:34pm The Home Health Nurse Ruth, just came and stayed for a couple of hours. She seems to like to take her am break at our house. She comes and drinks coffee, visits, has a couple of cigs and just visits. Then she does her exam of Sis and takes care of her medical stuff, catches up on all her paperwork and off she goes to her next apt. We really love our nurse and she's just great.
Now it's time to put Helens feet up and have her take a nap, till her niece comes to pick her up at 2pm.
I've got to go and do my am prayers, I'm late as usual, but better late than never.
I so am enjoying our group here and I hope you all are having a very nice day. I'll be back once our activities are over with and I'm going to take a rest time too.
Deb; My hopes and prayers are with you always. You know how badly I would love to be there for you, but so sorry I can't afford it either. I think 40% sounds a lot more promsing and I know you have to go through with this try and hopefully gain some of your ability back.
Nan; Go Girl!! I'm thankful that you were able to say the things that were weighing heavy on your mind. Even though it did not change the situation, it could make him think about it, next time he makes a new office policy and treats a patient so poorly. You really needed to say what was on your mind and I do hope it makes you feel better inside.
Chuck; I'm still getting used to the new Win7, I'm actually liking it pretty well. My puter seems to run much more smoothly, faster and just all around configured to work properly. There is still some of the set up, I need to perform, but just have not taken the time yet. I'll get to it as soon as I can though.
Ellie; I hope school is going good for you today and that your snow days made for some extra rest and not more work for you hon. Have a great day and I'll CU L8ter
Edress; I'm proud of you for pushing on with concern to your health care. I've found that every medical person who states "Not to believe all that's on the internet" is either threatened or has not been doing there Continued education credits. He's right in the fact that their are some very bad sites on the net, but not all of them are rubbish and many are much more knowlegeabel and up to date in the pain world, than the average MD. A huge problem in this countries medical schools, is that doctors are only required to take approx 5 hours of pain mgt classes, unless to choose as an ellective to take additional ones. 5 hours of pain mgt is not enough to treat any pain condition properly and not really even post surgical pain. In the future w/the help of some of the large internet pain groups, this will hopfully be changed. The Number one reason that a patient contacts their doc for in the coutry, is PAIN. Most of our doctors are train in how to elevate the pain, by fixing the broken leg/arm or strained muscles, cuts, bruises, etc or send the patient to the surgeon to take care of the problem. But they are not very well versed & knowledable with the 50 million other people who suffer from chronic illness or pain that never goes away, for what ever reason. Studies in the past 10 to 15 yrs, have found the Pain in itself can be an illness or what some consider to be the fifth vital sign. Not all doctors have been educated in the current theories and the matter of pain or trained in how to manage a patient long term. I know your going through a dreadful time right now. Your young and that really works against you too. You can do this and you'll get through it. We all have had to fight this fight and your on the right track, but you must push on. Can you share some of the ways you try to control your pain at home and the ones that work for you?
Well, I've gotta get for now and will try to get back here later.
Hugs gang Betty
Do not be dismayed by toil or suffering, nor by the meager fruit of your labors. Remember that God rewards not according to results, but effort.
Blessed Zefirino Agostini
Posts: 1203 | Location: Home in Washington State | Registered: 11-07-2007
I've had some pretty bad episodes lately. Yesterday at the doc's office, I had to call someone to come and pick me up because the pain was so bad, I could not drive home. Sigh... At least I was able to stay out of the ER.
Please keep Deb in your thoughts and prayers... She had to put her beloved dog, Oscar, down today. He was suffering from many health conditions and got to the point where he could not breathe well and was coughing terribly. I'll let her tell you the rest; I just wanted you guys to know so we could all support her.
Ok, gotta run. Pain is ramping up, again! Take care you guys... Love ya lots! ellie
Nite time greets all, Hope all of you had a low pain day, mine's been kinda rough. Up and down on the pain, mostly in my lower legs and rt foot. A really nice day though, if kinda cool. Nothin like Nan's though, hope your heat isn't too expensive. I agree with it was good to get it off your chest. Sometimes ya just gotta tell 'em, even if it doesn't change any thing. Guys I'm gonna call it a day, and try out a new cushion I ordered for my legs. Have a low pain nite. chuck
Greetings All: Deb: so sorry for your loss, we all love our puppies and feel your great pain. God hold you tight. Elle; baby please take care, I hope somewhere there is help for you, you poor thing...I wish I could take on your pain for you... Boops: don't over due it, i think you got it...have everybody help you with sis...and take the time off inbetween for betty to recover, pray, stretch out, and catch a few seconds of rest. Chuck: No wind today!!!! a little warmer. hope your feeling better today also.
Yesterday was a very sad day for me. I had to put Oscar to sleep. Thanks Ellie for letting everyone know. I knew it was coming of course after his diagnosis of Liver cancer last January but when he rallied in March, then continued to be well, I became complacent about his illness. In fact, I sort of wondered if there was a misdiagnosis about the kind of tumour because he had such a normal summer.
Oscar was 14 ½ years old and my best dog. I love (ed) all my animals but Oscar, an oversized, 12 lb, white Maltese, seemed to be part cat, part human and a little bit dog. LOL He worried about me all the time and was never far from my side. I know, it sounds ridiculous, but I think it was true. Oscar survived 2 cats and 3 dogs, 1 husband and 6 kids, growing up and then leaving. In fact, Oscar was really my daughter’s dog originally. We shared those live changes together and were there for each other all those years, in sickness and in health. I will miss him very much and now have to let go of all those years along with Oscar. He was the last link to my past life and family( before pain and life as single over 55 lady).
Oscar woke early on Monday morning with a bad occasional coughing fit. It was the loudest barking / croup type cough. It would start and stop. So I took him to the vet in the afternoon. The vet said his heart and lungs sounded fine and the cough sounded like his trachea was collapsing. He put him on antibiotics and a cough syrup with hydrocodone in it (that I had to buy at the drug store) and said if it wasn’t much improved by Tuesday morning to call him back.
The coughing fits grew worse despite the cough medicine. We were up all night except for a couple of hours, I think so I contacted the vet yesterday morning. He suggested taking an x-ray to make sure a tumour wasn’t pressing on his trachea so I took Oscar in right away. I knew his back was hurting with every cough. When the vet came with the x-ray results and showed me, he said he didn’t know how Oscar was able to breathe at all. He explained and I could see that his heart was so enlarged and surrounded by fluid that only one small part of one lung was functioning. His trachea had collapsed and showed a growth within it. His poor little abdomen was full of growths.
The vet said that he could treat the fluid build up to let him breath properly but this was a condition that would end his life eventually. I have known the vet for 25 years and said no. Oscar was in pain from the cough and I didn’t want that. So the vet gave him a strong tranquilizer injection and left us for 20 minutes. I held him in my arms and he slowly fell into a deep sleep, happy and secure. He was only comfortable if I held him standing (so the hell with my back). When the vet came back, he gave him the other shot and he was gone. I spent another 20 minutes with him and his poor little head was soaked with my tears.
I feel a real sense of loss and exhaustion but I know this will pass. I didn’t think Marco would react that much but I was wrong. He is quiet and keeps looking for Oscar and for my attention.
Thank you for letting me share my thoughts. It is so hard living alone. It was 2 years ago today, November 4th that Duncan and I separated. I had to leave the house until a court ordered him to leave the house and I could return. It feels like much longer ago yet if you scratch my emotional surface, the sadness sometimes feels like it happened yesterday.
Thank you all for your words of support for my upcoming surgery. I wish and hope all of you will get an opportunity to improve somehow. Each of us has different circumstances but pain is common among us. Somehow, we have to keep hope alive and yet be realistic and accepting of our abilities which can be different everyday. I know I will have a long road to recovery (if it is possible).
Hugs and love, Deb
As you give love out, it's received and reciprocated--and it grows. ............ and eventually it comes back. —Hill Harper
I hope you will all have good Thursday. Everything is relative of course.
I hope I didn't scare everyone away with my last post, maybe I should have kept my sad experience to myself but it helped me to talk to you about it. I am sorry if it hurt anyone.
Nan, you are amazing. I was re-reading the last posts of October and your visit to your old doctor. I still can't believe that it is even legal to leave you without proper care for your pump etc. I was wondering if you felt able to share with me / us more about your condition so that I can better support you.
Betty, how goes the visit with Helen this week. I think you are going home today. Is that right? It sounds like your back is really flaring. I hope you can get it back under control when you get home.
Chuck, how are you? Have you unpacked everything yet or do you have those last few boxes that always seem so difficult to unpack? LOL I hope you don't need the heating pad too much today.
Ellie, you are having such a hard time with pain and still doing your teaching and taking your Masters remotely and tuturing kids. You are amazing even if you think you should be able to do more. I feel that your schedule would quite challenging for anyone who is pain free. I wish you wouldn't be so hard on yourself.
Edress, Good for you to inform yourself more about your doctor's diagnosis. You are young and can't be expected to know what you "should" do in a medical emmergency. I hope you are able to get a blood sample to the ER or your doctor, if the vomiting happens again. Hang in there!
Hope all of you will be able to enjoy today. That is all we have...the future is unsure and the past is gone.
Hugs and Love, Deb
As you give love out, it's received and reciprocated--and it grows. ............ and eventually it comes back. —Hill Harper
Deb: Don't worry about sharing your pain about your baby. We all seem to have dogs and feel your pain. If you check my profile, I posted pretty much what shape my back was in the last time they could get decent pics of it. The spondylosis is extremely worse in cervical, can't get the tip of needle in without going thru, thus no ct's with dye. Dye goes straight to brain stem, and 23 hours is hospital. They can't fix this area without almost guaranteing paralysis. Surgeon says don't come back until something else is to bad, or you start to loose control, and we will have to try to stop it from getting worse. I really don't like to dwell on what is wrong, like most of us. I sometimes get tired of people moaning about their backs hurting.....if they only knew. As I have lived my life I have alway thought the song "the tears of a clown" was a proper theme song. As I get older it has become more appropo(sp). I was a employment tax auditor for the State of Indiana, and taught college computer classes at a local Catholic college which I had originally graduated from in 1978, the state paid for us to go back to school(whole thing) around 2002 and I got my second degree in CIS(computer information systems) first one in Accounting. After my fusion in june of 2005, doc wouldn't let me return to work. I waited 3 1/2 years for my social security. I am 53 yrs old and have 2 1/2 year old multipoo named missy. Pretty much that is it. I have kept my mind active by being involved in church. I was extrmely active in nfp's when i worked, boards etc. I am too numb to continue now, using 1 finger, ask anything else. have a good day
Greetings all, Hope you're having a good thursday. Not too bad pain wise, down to 6 or 7 not too bad. Nice sun shiney. Deb-I'm sorry for the loss of your beloved pet.. Don't won't about scaring us, if that's all it took we wouldn't be much friends in my book. It's like loosing part of your family I'm sure, with out these two here I think i'd go nuts sometimes. Nan-hope you're faring well today. I know the weather where you can be brutal. We still have boxes and stuff around but, most of is it's place. My daughter did most of the work as far as decorating and hanging photos and such. We'll actually have room to put up a christmas tree this year and do some decorating out side, my bro volunteered to hang some lights out side. We'll see how it goes.. Have a good day friends. chuck
Chuck: we are in a string of beautiful days, warming until sunday's mid 60's and no rain until maybe next week sometime. Sunny out, and so nice out Makes you glad you are part of God's plan. have a great day my friend
I'm sorry for my lack of posts yesterday. I started my day off, but walking down the hall way and finding Debbie(the old caregiver) sitting in her car in the middle of the road and staring strait in the window at me. I stopped and looked at her, so she reved her engine up and took off. I knew, since I caught her basically stocking us, that I was in for a strange day and it was not long till she was calling here and got me on the phone. UGH!! So my stress and day was shot from the get go.
Deb, I'm so very sorry to hear about your precious Oscar. I know how important he was to you and although it will be painful, you and Marco can know bond very closely too. Not to replace your dear ole friend, but as an additional blessing to your life. I know you've been worried about Oscar for a long time, but you can rest easy now knowing that he no longer is in any pain or discomfort and I truely beleive that this is not the last time we will see our special pets either. Someday he & you will meet again. And until then, he will remain in your heart and special memories. Love you Deb.
Friends, I'm all packed for Seattle and need to head home here really soon. Janice had to run two of my mom's doggies to the vet for yearly shots and will be right back, so I'm gonna get shut down, so I can head home to see my hubby.
Talk to you all after bit Lotsa Hugs Betty
Do not be dismayed by toil or suffering, nor by the meager fruit of your labors. Remember that God rewards not according to results, but effort.
Blessed Zefirino Agostini
Posts: 1203 | Location: Home in Washington State | Registered: 11-07-2007
Good late evening friends, Hope all of you, are having a good day. Not too much going on around here watching house reruns waiting for CSI to come on. Bobbi has one more 12 hr shift and then has the weekend, Saturday she's goin on a ride with her ridin club from work. It's a little depressing but, she deserves to get out for a while. She works hard for the priviledge. My bro will come over and hang out for a while so, it'll help. My daughter starts a new job sat also, another necessity. Anway, thought I'd stop in and say goodnite. Good nite all. chuck
He worried about me all the time and was never far from my side. I know, it sounds ridiculous, but I think it was true. Oscar survived 2 cats and 3 dogs, 1 husband and 6 kids, growing up and then leaving. In fact, Oscar was really my daughter’s dog originally. We shared those live changes together and were there for each other all those years, in sickness and in health. I will miss him very much and now have to let go of all those years along with Oscar. He was the last link to my past life and family( before pain and life as single over 55 lady).
I hope you don't need the heating pad too much today.
Chronic Pain Community 
