Bipolar Depression

I will start out by telling a little history. My husband and I have been together4 years now. When we first met he told me that he spent 6 weeks in the State mental hospital for some unusual behavior. He was released and was told he was bipolar. He quit taking any meds when he got out. I thought to myself you seem fine and never questioned it again. Thoughout our relationship we have had some real ups and downs. He is a alcholic and I always just blamed his behavior on that. We have a 2 year old son and a 6 week old daughter. Right before I had our daughter 6 weeks ago he started acting strange. Saying things that werent possible and wanting to do things that only a single man should be doing. He woke up one moring (April 1st) and decided he was going to go on a trip to NY. He left and only called a few times but when he did call the calls were very strange. One minute he was calling crying and the next he called to tell me he found Gold digging??? He came home 5 days later and told me "I want a divorce" I was shocked. Over the next few days life was hell! From telling me my kids (2 from previous marriage) were evil, to saying the FBI implated a chip into him and our son was implated into me. Well to make this story as short as possible, On easter Sunday we had a altercation and he stayed the night in jail. On monday I went to Probate court and had him probated into the psy. hospital.
He has no insight that he has a illness at all. He is on lithium at the hospital. He says he will stay on the meds when he gets out but I cant understand why he would take meds if he feels there is nothing wrong with him. I am scared of him at this point because his behavior hasnt been the same. He has changed his mind about the divorce and blames his problems on our relationship. He has said the only reason he has been acting "different" is because of our relationship is bad. Which in all honesty I didnt think there was anything wrong up to the point of him starting to go through a manic stage.
So we go to a probate hearing today to see what the doctors feel his treatment needs to be. He thinks he is going to get out today and once he realizes he isnt things ae gonna get out of control again.
Any advice on how I could help him get the insight that he has a illness would be helpful. I love him dearly but this is breaking me down. How do you deal with the rejection? I also dont understand how he can accespt a illness if he isnt in his right mind right now?
Please, any comments and advice would be very appreciated.

Hi Mdw4, I thought that I'd reply to you as no one else has yet. I have posted a thread elsewhere on this forum entitled What now? So really we are in a similar situation.. Thankfully, I have no kids which must make it really hard for you.

My husband had to be admitted to hospital in march, stayed there 10 days before he managed to get his lawyers to get him out. His discharge notice actually says that he lacks insight and this is where the difficulty lies. I have spent hours trying to find out how we can give them this insight into their illness and actually there is nothing that can be done. Acceptance of this condition is a bit like the bereavement process and takes a long time and many steps.

I too had to have my husband arressted by the Police the other week as he assulted me. He was let off but as I was using the Civil Courts to try and keep us safe, I have been able to go back there to get various orders and another court date for june. The reason I have used this is to try and get my husband to see that he either accepts his condition or he faces the full consequences of English Law and this is exactly what the Judge said to him.

I know he has been to the hospital today "just to prove that there is nothing wrong with him". However, he couldn't do anything as the Psychiatrist he wanted to see had to go off on an emergency call and wouldn't see her Junior as he hates her, a bit like he hates me as we have both clocked him and his illness.

As for all that talk of divorce and how it's the fault of our relationships with them rings true for me too. This is common and I have been hearing it for months. Funny that now we're not living together, he is still ill. His father and him are still fixating on me for doing all the stuff I am doing. Sometimes I think we should all just walk away but it's so hard...

Hope this helps you a bit and good luck.