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He has promised never to try to take his life again. That said, there are many ways to off himself that doesn't include overdosing on Valium or breathing in toxic gas. He can easily just stop eating. He's done that before and only forces himself to eat at my request. Anyway, we'll see, I guess. For now, I have his doctor and the ambo service on speed-dial, and I guess, that will have to do.
Anyway, the best of luck to you, too, Chatty. I hope you soon heal.
I'm so sorry to hear that not only you, but now your child is being subjected to the control and manipulation. I hope it all gets resolved very soon for you as I'm sure it's sheer heartache and very stressful to be going through that.
I have only a thimbleful of knowledge on this subject, but from the little I experienced and everything I've read here, from what you've described, it certainly sounds like control is still what he's after. Or maybe he's acting out of desparation??
I don't know. But it seems that one of the struggles they face is controlling themselves; both their thinking and their behavior. Maybe controlling others is how they overcompensate??
Best to you and all the others here. Wishing everybody peace and happiness in the new year!
Yes Mystified I agree it is either desperation or control. I don't want him harming our son with his behavior so I haven't allowed him physical contact with him (our son doesn't want to be around him either). We also limit the phone contact as well because it seems as though all he can do is lie to us, make threats, blame us for his problems, or use his "poor me lines". Oh and all the while he is trying to convince my family what a wonderful person he is, and how he really wanted to buy our son something for Christmas he didn't. I think it was his way of manipulating them and trying to get me to talk to him. Of course he hasn't sent him or bought him anything which is not a problem. The problem is that he texted our son and told him that he didn't get him anything for Christmas because he didn't know what he wanted. For me that's implying that our son is to blame for that. I mean he is his father, and if he was a good father wouldn't he have an idea what our son wanted for Christmas??? Alternatively he could have bought him something he wanted him to have and sent gift receipts right?? Or better yet has he ever heard of a gift card?? Again I have no problem with him buying him anything because my family and I purchased him the things he wanted......the problem that I have with him is that he took it upon himself to blame our son. Isn't it something how some people with bp can't think outside their box to do the RIGHT things, but they are very creative when doing the WRONG things like manipulating others??? Again I am so glad I left him. And his behavior just shows me that whether we stayed in his life or not, without treatment he'll carry on the same old behavior. And to think that he had recently wrote letters explaining how he wasn't going to be making anymore EXCUSES. I'm fortunate to know that he still bluffs. Oh and of course we didn't respond to his message.
Never, never, never. The extent of the lies, deception and cheating is staggering. I'm in the process of divorcing my bipolar husband. We've been together close to 20 years. He had a major manic episode in October. Truly, he was a completely different person. Even his way of walking and speaking changed. The look in his eye was that of a stranger. I discovered that for at least a year he was syphoning off money from the joint account into his own (which I didn;t know existed) to pay 5 credit cards...the expenses on those cards were for gambling, women, apartments, sex, alcohol etc. Those bills went to another address he had been maintaining. Hey...we never even had a fight in 20 years...I thought it was a pretty decent relationship...I considered his 'shutting down', coldness, lack of empathy, lack of sex, something we could work through. I worked, earned more money than he did...but when he left he cleaned out the account...left 54 cents...That was a day or 2 before Thanksgiving. When I caught on because his lies about having to work a few days a week outside our city just didn't make sense, all he did was pack his bags and walk out. Our son was right there. He never spoke a work to him...just left. His attorney called and said he wanted a divorce because I was impossible to live with (!). I truly thought I had done something wrong and destroyed my marriage...Since then, I found e-mails between him and a much younger woman. They met 2/3 months ago. She instructs him how to take the money and divorce me. She wrote all the e-mails from him to me, which he simply fowarded on...They are all about money. The e-mails between them just congratulate each other on what good people they are and how many beautiful children they are going to have...- Its all about manipulation, control, lies and deceit. Its about emotional and financial betrayal. If I hadn't discovered the truth about what was really going on I would still be crying and beating myself up today and how I must have destroyed my marriage. I repeat..it is about manipulation, control, lies, theft and deceit. Turn around and run, don't walk as far away as you can get. LIsten to the voices of experiences on this site. Save yourself while you still can.
No. I did it over again and am trying to get out of it now. My wife and I divorced in 02 before she was diagnosed with bipolar. A year later, after I had gotten my life back together again, we remarried. It was good for awhile then began another downward spiral. I wish I hadn't and would not do it again.
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